When I lost my Friend to Death

Oh Death! why do you do this to us? why do you snatch from us the ones dear to our heart?

It was a dry Saturday morning. I was standing in front of the old church building where I received my baptism. And as I trod towards the entrance; the cold biting wind lashed my tender skin, reminding me of the harsh realities that my body had to endure as long as I live. As I stepped into the chapel, it seems dim and a pensive mood hanged over everyone seated.

He was just 15 years old, strong, energetic and a happy going individual who, some few months ago escaped a gas explosion. I met him a week ago, exactly in this same church. We talked about our future and what we planned to do with it. Evan told me how he plans on becoming a civil engineer. He wants to take over his dad construction business.

He had recently gone through some rough times; a situation he attributed to his own bad choices. He promised me he had turned on a new leave and determined to make the best out of his remaining years in high school.

But it was short lived. Evan is dead! Died in a car crush. He was on his way to spend the Christmas with his grandparent, when the bus he was traveling on, got a burst tire. A truck coming from behind smashed into them, killing him instantly.

Seating on this hard mahogany pew waiting for the last funeral rite of my dear friend, I heard wailing as his final remains were ushered into the chapel. Tears and wailing could be heard from every corner of the church, such a young and promising soul this world had lost. I couldn’t explain what happened to me as uncontrollable tears drained from my eyes.

I can’t get over the loss of a friend I called a brother. I always wondered what life would have dished him- a good meal of success or an empty tray of disappointment? It’s been 10 years and I asked myself, if I had lived the kind of life I told me friend.

My purpose in life keep changing, one time I wanted to be a pilot. Another time, I wanted to be a president and not forgetting the countless time I tried convincing my sister why I did be a great computer scientist. It seems I couldn’t settle on anything that will keep my focus still.

I haven’t really discovered my mission in life. I don’t seem to have a vision of where I want to direct my life to. I have a fair idea of what kind of life I wish to be enjoying, and what I need to do to arrive at that point but my goals keeps changing.

Would I be considered a visionless young man? Or am I just acting human? But I have a burning desire inside me; to bring change into the lives of millions of people. I want them to know how significant they are to the world and what little change each can do to make the world better.

I have begun a journey of rediscovering myself, knowing my true purpose and the kind of impact I want to make. I have made my own share of mistakes that have brought me disappointments and a lack of fulfillment.

I’m learning how to be more patient with myself, taking each day, one step at a time and doing the very thing I know well help me be the change the world needs.

I sometimes wish, the process of change was much faster but there is no way one can parachute themselves to what they want to become without going through the process of growth. It’s torturing to wait that long for the right time to show the world what good you are made of.

Life is a journey of steps which require effort to complete and patient to go through to the end. We should remember to keep the core purpose of what impact we want to make and hold it in our mind’s eye. This will make our journey much easier to bear and waiting much comforting to endure.

“R.I.P Evan”